Please join us in a “celebration of life” for six distilleries now passed on to the big warehouse in the sky. Many expressions are off the market entirely and some are rarities that are skyrocketing in value and nearly impossible to find. Included will be the infamous Littlemill 27yr valued at $3000-$4000.
At the Shore Duty Chapel o’Mourning we will eulogize each whisky with its history and cause of death. Please wear dark colors to solemnize the occasion. Tacos to be provided with fries or a salad, to ease the pain in your soul and belly. Kleenex and glassware will be provided. We are sorry for your loss.
The Deceased
Littlemill 27yr 2017 Release
Glenesk 1984 G&M CC 24yr
North Port 1975 26yr Silent Stills
St. Magdalene 1982 G&M Rare old
Dallas Dhu 1982 Signatory
Millburn 18yr Rare Malts
Darkness falls upon the land
One by one the stills go dead
Each murdered by a corporate hand
So vodka could be poured instead
They slew the ancient and the young
And let their corpses rot in mud
Yet now you wait with thirsty tongue
To taste their final golden blood
You start to feel a numbing chill
The thrill of what you shall consume
The spawn of but six hallowed stills
Await within six glassy tombs
Yet as the spirit meets its end
Your Glencairn starts to quiver
For few mere mortals dare to send
The Undead to their liver